Paris, March 17th.

It’s saturday morning, the sun is shinin’, spring is comin’, and I’m about to have my breakfast on my balcony. But as I walked outside,about to light up my cigaret, something stunt me (and it was not a bee). What, them again ?! Seriously… So here I am, eating my croissant face to face with the Saturday I won’t be living outside. How did I know that ? A line of big fat police trucks parked just on our street. No, the Gay Pride isn’t until June. So why are they all here for ? Oh that’s right, the Yellow Vests struck again (thx BFM tv). Baby one too many time.

To be honest, I never thought my color would be so trendy this year. And god knows I cannot ask fashion icon Karlito his opinion on the topic (you know why). Seriously, I’ve been eyeing so many people wearing those yellow jackets for so long now, I almost thought they were cousins. Sure, their yellow isn’t the same shade as mine (let’s just say some swag is missing out there), but they do bring some light into the parisian grey atmosphere. Sadly, not everyone enjoys this color like me or Jordan who loves wearing it (I guess he’s gay). And why not ? Yellow is a color that shines through your eyeball and make you happy at its sight. Yes, just like the sun, and it sure guides you. I mean, look at McDonald’s sign, it’s not yellow for no reason. So when you see one, you can notice it from afar and rush to it.  Joy and fun, spring and summer, Big Mac and fries, that’s what yellow is all about ! So all these people hating it and pulling long faces should definitely start wearing this color. Docter’s orders.

But as I witnessed a violent argument between a hot police officer and an angry Yellow Vest, I couldn’t help but wonder : did they chose this color because of what I just said ? These Yellow Vests, did they want to bring joy in the air and act like street lamps ? But right when those demonstrators started breaking into the poor little Fouquet’s, I suddenly realized something. Or should I say, remember it. Here’s my theory (and Jordan agrees with me) : yellow does not only stand for all the good stuff I mentionned earlier. No, unfortunately, it also represents being cheated on. That’s right, I’m not only wearing happiness and American fast-food logo on me, I’m also channeling one of the biggest sin all religions harshly forbid (but I’m not pious, oops). That would be the only explaination for all this drama and trouble we’ve been experiencing for 4 months now. These Yellow Vests act this bad and edgy because they felt betrayed by our Government. Hence, the yellow color… See how fashion can be such a great statement. Karlito would have put it in his next collection for sure.

So next time you feel the urge to judge someone, look at the colors they’re wearing. It may tell you more than you thought about their intentions and feelings. But in the meantime, give my your croissant (cos’ I threw mine to my cousins outside). Oops.

Jordan

Easy-going 27 year-old bitch.